LET Reviews – House Calls: Why Are Boys & Men Struggling For Connection?

Hello! I’m Luke Sheldon, a 16-year-old high school student living in Woburn, Massachusetts. Today, I’d like to share my thoughts on a thought-provoking podcast titled “House Calls: Why Are Boys & Men Struggling For Connection?” In this insightful discussion, the podcast was hosted by none other than the esteemed US Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy. Joining him was Richard Reeves, a distinguished scholar renowned for his expertise in boys and men, inequality, and social mobility. Together, they delved into the often-overlooked struggles faced by young men and boys in our society.

Reeves and Dr. Murthy kicked off the podcast by explaining how each passing year feels increasingly overwhelming. Most can relate to this notion. What is it about the “good old days” that we yearn for? It could be the feeling of not needing technology or social media. It could be the lack of responsibilities we had. Whatever it was, it’s in the past, and now it’s up to us to move along with society. However, as a young man myself, moving along with society is easier said than done. Growing up as a male, I and my peers have faced many widely overlooked struggles.

For too many men, they have felt to be on the sidelines when it comes to the forces of progress, and have felt the need to miniaturize their own sense of themselves, which has, to a degree, made us fundamentally different from women. It’s vital to address this growing concern. However, many people believe opening up the conversation on the inequalities men and boys face is a betrayal of our commitment to fight for women’s equality; but to Reeves, “one can think of two thoughts at once, and we should ensure both boys and girls are doing well.”

In order to ensure both boys and girls are doing well, it must start with having hard conversations. In pursuit of this goal, the podcast discusses troubling statistics regarding men’s mental health, notably the alarming fact that men are four times more likely to commit suicide than women. Equally worrying is the fact that 15% of young men confessed they don’t have a close friend, highlighting a concerning trend. Additionally, 50% of American men think they are being punished for simply acting like men—largely thanks to the overarching sense that mainstream society is somehow against men. As a result, many young men have conveyed this sense of feeling invisible; that if they disappeared tomorrow, nobody would care. This is an incredibly harmful mindset.

Handling these concerns doesn’t need an intricate nationwide policy change; as a male, simply being seen is what we need. Naming the problem is part of solving it. All men want to feel seen and heard, and as a society, we’re missing the opportunity to tell them: You matter, people need you. Dr. Murthy says, “Humans have three basic needs regardless of their cultural background: We all want to be seen and understood, we all want to know that we matter, and we all to be loved.” How you treat the person right in front of you makes a difference, even though it might seem trivial. Embracing this simple yet profound insight can guide us toward fostering a more compassionate and understanding society that uplifts men’s mental well-being.